Yesterday, one of my best friends (and her entire family, whom I love and refer to as "my other fam") was having an incredibly tough day, filled with hospital time, long-distance phone calls, muttered prayers to higher powers, and anxiety. The type of day you wouldn't wish on anybody, but it pains you particularly to see happening to ones you care deeply for.
So I sat at my desk, sending texts and messages of love and support, unable to help in any other way, shape or form. It sucked and I hated it. Does that make sense? I wish there was more I could have done. I mean, I know messages are "comforting" in a sense, but having been through similar situations myself, I just wish there were more I could do, to be supportive without getting in the way. We don't live in the same state, so I couldn't even be like "stay at the hospital as long as you need, I'll walk your dog" or whatever.
As I had these thoughts and stewed in my own sadness and anxiety, I wondered why I felt this deep desire to help. The answer seems simple at first "you care about this family, and you want to support them during a hard time." But then the more I think about it, the bigger and more important that idea feels to me. We cannot fix things that are beyond us. I can't cure disease, change history, or fly. All I have to offer is my heart and shoulder, and I will always give it freely to the people I love. The sensible part of my brain knows there's nothing I can personally do, short of my good wishes. I can't leave work and hop on a plane, and frankly, even though they feel like family, it's not my place to do so. Can you go too far for friends? I'd like to think the answer is no, but I'm not certain. You have to figure out where you fit in and contribute in the way that's most appropriate for you. In my case, it was supportive messages, and the offer of help if needed. I hope Other Fam knows they can call me if they really do need me.
I'm like Ghostbusters..if you need me, call...and I'll be even more likely to answer if this cake makes an appearance....look at the Slimer detail! Awesome!
But truly, as for my friend...even though I don't name names for privacy's sake, keep the good people in your thoughts today. I haven't really prayed in a long time, but I keep friends in my heart, and hope that today you'll do the same.
